Is Different Wrong?

I had a discussion today with a psych professor about autism and whether it was an atypical/wrong developmental path or just an alternate/different path. When there are more than 1 in every 100 kids who have autism, then is it truly atypical, or a sign that some children are just evolving into taking a different pathway through the developmental process? If we see the path autistic children take (or rather, paths) as negative and wrong and something to be altered or stopped, perhaps we're hindering their journey.

Ultimately the goal for any child is that they be able to function in society – socially, physically, economically, etc. Our job as parents is to give our children the tools to make that often difficult journey to adulthood and independence. Perhaps we need to take a step back from the situation. What if we approach autism as a different path rather than just a disability. I prefer to think of Aidan as different, not damaged. If I take into account the different path he's on, and try to ascertain what the differences ARE in that path, then I can give him appropriate tools for that particular path he's taking.

Aidan's big differences have been in speech, potty training, and social maturity. He stopped speaking around age 2 and stopped potty training as well, after normal and even accelerated development up until that point. It took him about two years to catch up and he's been about two years behind ever since. He's almost 8 years old and in first grade and that's a really big deal because he's made it this far. I think that as time passes that maturity gap will slowly grow smaller. Each child with autism has a different set of developmental differences or challenges. Actually, EVERY child has a different set of developmental challenges. Most of those challenges are predictable and acceptable and so we know what to do, based on others' experiences, to help the child along their developmental path. Speech therapy, physical therapy, occupational therapy and ABA therapy are tools for autistic children to meet those same developmental goals, but on their own path and timetable.

Same goal, different path. Is that really a bad thing?