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Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Melt Downs

Last week Aidan had a huge meltdown on Wednesday and another the next day.  He had gone so long before that without having a meltdown - probably at least 6 months, maybe more.  I don't know what was different or what had been bothering him that made it so easy to set him off, but one simple little thing didn't go the way he expected it to and he fell apart. 

Wednesday (which was when the full moon was - could this have been the underlying cause?) the trigger was as simple as taking a lego toy away from him because he took it outside.  It wasn't a punishment, and he could still have it inside.  I explained to him that if he took it outside to play with it with his friend, that he could drop it and break it and even lose pieces.  He threw a mini fit and so I told him that he could come inside (it was bordering on a meltdown at this point, but I didn't recognize the signs).  He dried it up and went back to playing with Robby (the next door neighbor), so I thought everything was alright.  Not five minutes later, I heard him in the garage screaming his head off.  I went out there and he was crying and screaming about his lego toy.  He wouldn't tell me what was wrong, but he was obviously mad about something.  Once again, I told him he could come inside if he couldn't dry it up.  This time he didn't though, he only became more enraged.  Because of that I attempted to take his hand and lead him inside - of course, that didn't work.  His self-control completely dissolved at this point, and as I tried to pick him up to carry him inside he began to shriek and to hit and kick me.  It took me a couple of minutes to even manage to pick him up.  Stupid me, I still didn't recognize that this was a meltdown at this point. 

Once I got him inside, I put him in his room and closed the door.  Usually he calms himself down and cries for a little while and then is perfectly fine.  Not this time.  He began hitting the door, throwing things (trash can, toys, toy boxes, tried to throw the television), and screaming.  I went in and he started hitting and kicking me, so I held him - I finally recognized that this was a meltdown, but of course that didn't really matter at this point.  Once I got him to stop hitting and trying to throw things, I sat in the floor and he laid with his head in my lap and allowed me to rub his back.  He was still screaming and crying "mamamamamamamamamama" - not anything to do with me, this is just a noise he makes when he's extremely stressed or overstimulated.

This whole meltdown lasted around 30 minutes, and afterward he wouldn't talk or look at me.  He had calmed down enough that I felt it was safe to leave him in his room.  A little while later he came out and ate dinner and was talking and making eye contact again.  When I put him in bed, he apologized for being unhappy and throwing a fit, telling me he couldn't get control.  He was aware it was a meltdown, even if I wasn't.

The next day at school he had a meltdown as well, this one only last about 15 minutes according to the aide.  Apparently he couldn't sit down (he told me he couldn't), and when he melted down he told her (or rather screamed to her) that he couldn't get control.

I don't know what sparked this behavior.  He's been perfectly fine since then.  I have no idea what happened to be able to prevent it in the future.  Maybe it was my stress over school and planning a bridal shower. Maybe it was the full moon.  Maybe it was a string of events over the previous several days that none of us could have known would lead to a meltdown.  Whatever it was, hopefully I'll recognize earlier in the meltdown next time, that it IS a meltdown instead of fueling it into a bigger meltdown.

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